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FUNNY QUOTES & HUMOR Posts

What Women Need In Life



There are three things a woman needs in life.

The first is water. The second is food. And the third one is compliments.

Definetly she needs compliments!



Funny Guy and Stupid Quotes



Hello!

Let me try to make you laugh by telling you some funny and stupid quotes. SO, let me start.

You don’t have to worry over what other people are thinking about you, because they’re probably too busy worrying over what you are thinking about them!

How long is a minute? Well, it depends on which side of the bathroom door you’re on.

Never call a man a fool. borrow from him!

Yesterday, while showering I looked closely to my shampoo bottle, and a question came to my mind. Why shampoo bottles have instructions? No one reads them anyway. What would someone do with shampoo apart washing his hair? Would he make a soup? Give it to his dog instead of water? Fill an aquarium with it and put the fish to swim in shampoo? Take it as a cough medicine? Heat it up and put a bag of tea in it? Water the plants? Drink it instead of wine?

Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, and a dark side, and
it holds the universe together…

The worst month of the Year is February. Why? Because February has only 28 days in it, which means that if you rent an apartment, you are paying for three
full days you don’t get. Try to avoid Februarys whenever possible!

If you put garbage in a computer nothing comes out but garbage. But this garbage, having passed through a very expensive machine, is somehow enobled and none dare criticize it.



In a MENTAL ASYLUM



Me in a mental asylum funny quote

Sometimes I wonder how come I’m not in a MENTAL ASYLUM? Then I take a look around at everyone else and realize that perhaps I already am!